when things finally went wrong,
you spoke and begged for everything.
when peace arrived,
you left, having fun, i knew.

when i was sick and in bed,
you never cared, more over,
you didn't even know or bother.

when you wanted fun and joy,
you came with open arms,
seeking more and more.

people often think of us,
being carefree and oh so loving.
but what they couldn't see
was the side of fading love and unending fueds.

when i wonder, will you really love me,
hold up the end of your deal,
will you?

It's gone.
What's gone?
My mind?Soul?
No, I'm fine
Not really
Deep inside, something is missing
The love and tender kissing
She walked out herself
Now all I do is talk to myself
in the mirror, with my reflection
My heart is dead
Soon it will make a resurrection
Once the wounds heal
And I'm loved for real
A type of love I can feel
But nobody loves me
Nobody cares
Nobody loves me
That nobody is me
I can't love myself because no one does
I'm all alone and no longer what I once was
But the only thing that keeps me alive
Is knowing that the next day, it might all change
For the best
And that "nobody" becomes somebody.

Something so hard
goes straight to the soul;
it seems impossible to get over
and my heart is left with a big hole.
I'm trying to be happy, wearing a smile;
but I'm dying inside.
The world seems to be fading,
and I just want to run and hide.
Everywhere I go I see your face,
and realise how much I miss you;
and on the day you died
a piece of me died too.

How do you walk away from someone you love
And take the road of friend;
Can you reroute the course you have taken
And start over once again?
I don't really want to let you go
But inside me I know I must;
The times we've loved . . . the times you've left
My heart says stay . . . but it's my mind I must trust.
We have shared so much together
Laughter . . . fun times . . . tears;
Yet sometimes we can't turn back time
We must walk away, and allow ourselves to heal.
I know one day you will be happy
And your soulmate you will find;
I know we each have one out there
Even if for now . . . only in our minds.
May life be gentle with you
May God's best come your way;
And on some quiet tomorrow
You will realise things were better this way.

Remember then,
Dreaming of when
Our childhood fears
Would be gone with the years.
Now we look at the past
Wondering why it didn't last.
Days in the hot sun
Always having fun.
Going for a ride
Letting the bike glide.
Biking, sledding,
Swimming, swinging,
Days of old
Never to be sold.
Signs of change
Widely range.
Moving away
No more play.
Friends forever
Talk almost never.
Through the years,
Our lives shift gears.
Laughter, smiles,
Fears, miles,
Distant souls
Drifting goals.
Friendship the art
Connects our hearts.
Now that it is when
We dream of Then.

Feelings of confusion,
Depression,
Uncertainty.
Where do I belong?
Where do I go?
What do I do?
Pick up the phone.
No one to call.
What would I say?
Get in the car.
No where to go.
No one to see.
Deep inside
Is the urge to scream.
At what?
Trapped.
No escape.
Have the need,
The desire,
The want,
For release -For freedom.

Some people are wrongfully convicted.
Putting in Appeals, hoping the charges will be lifted.
A prison cell, now their new home.
Entrapped, inside razor barb fences.
With no more freedom to roam.
A lot of precious years, will be lost.
At somebody else's cost.
Taking everything day by day.
The only thing left to do is hope and pray.
Maybe some day, the real criminal will meet their fate.
Wrongfully convicted, and having a lot of hate.
Pushed through the system, so they can close the case.
Not able to accept what has happened.
Sooner or later, it will have to be faced.
Innocent as hell, we shouldn't be here.
Living a life of constant fear.
Maybe, they'll realise they made a mistake.
Hopefully some day, when I awake.
I will hear I'm a free man.
And a journey home, I'll take.

not mine, but ruq.'s!

I don't know when my laughter turned to tears,
When my joys became my fears,
when one touch and you'd be gone,
and I'd be standing all alone.
I laughed till I cried,I knew,
but still I tried,To make a place in your life.
You walked away without a word,
you neither saw nor heard
The love I tried to prove
The way my life, around you moved.
I don't know how long I cried
and wished that I had died.
And how my body ached for you,
And how you ignored my love so true.
So, I'm standing all alone again,
Wiping the tears that always begin,
Every day and every night
and every silent moment of my life ,
Whenever I think of the many ways
I was a fool for you.

I retreat into a world of calm
A world created out of desperation
and cowardice
I'm all alone in my reality
There will be no betrayal or abandonment, for I'll never let you in
I float on a cloud of disinterest as
your offers of help go unanswered
In my world I need no one
No lovers, no friends, no higher power
My world would only frighten you
Beneath the placid calm of
consciousness lies an underworld of bitterness, rage, mistrust
Madness awaits
Leave me alone on my cloud of calm
and I may come back to you
Push me and I'll fall.